Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Posting from the Central Command

As promised, here is the tale of what happened to me in the last six weeks. You’ve heard some portion of it at different places. Some of you will accept that this is what I heard and just look at it for the value that might be extracted from it. Some will have other views and it doesn’t much matter to me what they are. I’m not making any claims about myself in regard to this and I’m not going to say anything about what I was told personally, or where mentioned, except in one incidence as you will see.

I was told some permutation of the same thing over and over. I was told to take some of the Ayahuasca that I have, on several occasions. The intensity of the experience would increase and diminish according to what was happening and sometimes more watered down versions were far stronger than what I had from the initial first time ingestion. Though I have had well over a thousand of these sorts of engagements over the years I have never before had the potency of the moments accelerated and diminished according to the will of the one in control of the matter and I assure you that that wasn’t me.

Given my somewhat vast experience in these matters I think I can be relied on to know the difference between what is actual and what is imagined. As I said, I don’t care what anyone thinks about this so spare me your giving me the Buddha-rap about something you weren’t present for and which repeated itself nearly the same way every time and regardless of whether the chemicals were present or not present, or were psychedelic or just Campari fueled. It didn’t matter... and it kept happening and sometimes it still jumps in for a little while and goes away and it is a good thing that I went mad a long time ago because otherwise it would have been overwhelming at times and I was also alone for the whole period and in a secluded rural setting.

Just the details with brevity at hand; for what is in order. First glimmer was a wide yawn and a soft voice saying, “Thank you visible for waking me up.” Imagine cobwebs being brushed aside from dreaming eyes... I didn’t have to. I was there. (and this is the extent of where I will go with personal references except when I was being addressed.

“Yes. Thank you for waking me up ( it’s to be understood that that means woken up in me and for the purpose of the process). I’ve been dreaming. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t here. I was. It’s different now. I’m waking up. The first thing I’m going to do is stretch a little... (and some of that happened) and then I am going to have my morning coffee. Time’s different for me than it is for you visible but. I have to say, in this case... it’s not going to be the usual long stretch. No, I’m here now and it’s going to move more quickly but not at human speed. So... I’m going to stretch and then I’m going have my morning coffee and then I am going to confer my blessings. As usual this means fewer than I would have liked.

After this... after I have stretched and had my morning coffee and dispensed my blessings, I am going to offer forgiveness. I am going to open a window. I am going to make an hour of forgiveness... which won’t be your time... but I am going to offer this and some will take advantage of my mercy and... I am merciful... you may be sure. In many cases... I am inclined toward forgiveness. In some cases there is no forgiveness and you know some of who they are and they wouldn’t take it anyway; preferring my other side which they do not realize is also me. And after that (and here he repeats the same litany over again as he does every time) after I have done these things and offered my forgiveness and my forgiveness has been accepted or rejected, unseen or ignored... well, after that, after that, visible... I am going to kick some ass. I am going to show up. I am going to show up right in the middle of the evil doings... right in the middle of the evil doers and I am going to expose them and present them to the world for the opprobrium and censure and punishment that this world has to give and then I am going to send them to Hell.” And so I shook and trembled at this as I did every time it got said and... it would show up hours... days later.... It didn’t matter... it would show up and get said again emphatically. This went on for about six weeks and I was barely hanging on a lot of the time but able to do what I had to do when I had to do it.

At times this scared the shit out of me and I was told not to worry because I had to go through this to hear this and it would be over soon. I was, on occasion crushed by the immensity of it. I had to go lay down on my futon couch and my right knee would slam over and over again into the cushion as various points were emphasized. And this happened whether I was on something or not on something and it didn’t matter if these ‘something’s’ were radically different in atmosphere. There was no escaping it. There was often no warning, though sometimes there was; “I want you to go lay down for a little while visible cause I have to do some stuff..” and of course I did... some of it did not feel good. It was like being born or washed when you don’t want a bath.

I was introduced to the ‘thought packages’ which are a little like those Indian dream catchers that you see and they appear in the air... it’s an email kind of thing and I saw some poisonous shit. I was dragged at high speed through foundries and dungeons and abandoned hospitals with scum and water and blood on the floor and I saw Hellraiser type entities half flesh, half metal parts, sometimes joined on Ferris Wheels and Whirley Gigs with lots of people slicing and dicing and Leggo-connecting and detaching and Hieronymus Bosch aspected things. Sometimes this was scary to the point of the total loss of self and sometimes it was just ‘here we go’... the movie, Jacob’s Ladder comes to mind also. But there was always the light and the presence to be found and I was sometimes in a state where all I could say was, “I love you God.” Over and over as if that was the only mantra or thing I could hold on to and that was enough.

It’s still doing this but it is many, many times easier to experience than it was. It’s more benevolent now but it still throws things at me and says, “Oh, by the way, you have to look out for that too.”

Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt would show up, others too and be right there and it would be, “How would you like to be me?” ...not in a negative way. Later for that stuff... but funny.... Very and there was no mistaking that it was their persona to walk around in.

I could do a ream of paper on what happened and not cover it so, Let me go back to what I heard over and over and over. “Thank you for waking me up....” And then the whole litany gets said again. In conclusion for this post, for this part, he went on to say that he knew exactly where everybody was and exactly what all of them were doing and that they had better take advantage now of the hour of forgiveness or they had better fucking run and hide, not that that will do any good. During this period... the stretching happened, the morning coffee happened, the blessings happened and they are continuing and may not be seen or noticed right away and the forgiveness portion is in the process at the moment.

This is the general theme. He also said,

“I know how it is with the people. They have these armies and money. They have these networks of control. Who is going to fuck with them? Uh Huh... I am going to fuck with them.. They want to know where I’m going to come from? They want to know where am I going to get the might to do these things? Hey, I’m God... I can do what I please and as for showing up... I am going to show up inside of them and I am going to teach them the meaning of the word Fear.

“I’m going to screw up what they do and turn it back on them. I am going to expose them and they are going to run but there will be no where to run. I am going to hang them up in front of each other and so on and so forth and so very much more.”

That’s some small portion of it, without the emphasis part that I got and without the visuals and sound effects which were state of the art. So if you wonder why I am talking the way I do these days well... this is why.

Visible sings: Songwriter by Les Visible♫ Everlasting Love ♫
'Everlasting Love' is track no. 2 of 10 on Visible's 2006 album 'Songwriter'
Lyrics (pops up)

Songwriter by Les Visible

Saturday, September 06, 2008

Mea Culpa... Ex Apologia... Ad Nauseum...

Well... I don’t have to give much thought to what I will write about today because that subject matter has been decided for me. Interestingly enough, a lot of the people commenting on the subject have gone to other blogs to make their comments for reasons best known to them. To be sure, the subject was discussed here as well but not in the context of the reply given one’s capacity to extract ‘tell phrases’.

Drugs and spiritual inquiry have been aligned since either of them appeared. History shows this, whether you are talking about hash used among Sufi’s and other Muslims; psychedelics among native cultures (and many others across the board), various substances among The Druids and all manner of societies that made use of things termed ‘sacraments’ and other names. There’s quite an argument made for the use of mushrooms by St. John of Patmos who wrote, or channeled, the chapter called “Revelations” in the New Testament. One can read “The Sacred Mushroom and the Cross” or any of a number of other declarative and speculative commentaries.

My first hand experience tells me that real spiritual experiences are possible with certain compounds. I’ve had them. Some of them transformed me beyond whatever I had been before and set the stage for further permutations on up the road. There are people who weren’t there and who have no personal experience to rely on for refutation who will discount my experiences. It’s tantamount to someone who’s never been swimming, arguing about the experience with someone who has. But this never stops people. You find the high and mighty of the opinionated, uninformed running wild in every theater of life. You’re more likely to find that than you are likely to find someone who has experience in the matter.

Ordinarily I don’t think about this much. I let my experiences speak to me and when I don’t have them I let the visceral mind or my intuition lead the way. Some people are offended and aghast at my nerve in speaking about certain substances in relation to spiritual gain and psychological well being. They want me to know in no uncertain terms that it is wrong, dangerous or foolish or something that they have determined while... never having been near a swimming pool or only dipping their toes in a time or two when I have been swimming for years and years in all kinds of water and weather. I’ve little doubt that there are people who know a lot more about the subject than I but I doubt that there are many who went as full bore into it as I and... I’m still here and as I have mentioned... in much better shape than most anyone my age and I smoke roll-up cigarettes and so on and so on. So-


Giving me advice like some Old West School Marm with her hands on her hips; wagging your fingers and parroting things you read is pretty much like Nuns talking to school kids about sex. I don’t mean to come off as arrogant or abrasive. It is not my intention but... in the interest of full disclosure some amount of impact needs to be spiced up in the pan sort of like Cajun Blackened cat-fish. It may not be to everyone’s taste but you tend not to forget being served the dish.

Probably there are people out there who attribute my absence to a number of things. At the same time it is important to me that the reader knows who they are dealing with. I’m not of a mind to lie to you like so many do. I’m not inclined to talk about the things I talk about and leave you with the impression that I’m all dolled up in yogic garb and sitting on a tiger skin in the woods. I’m not about airbrushing my person or personality so that I can be televised or sell soap to people who refuse to bathe or who haven’t a clue what it is to be clean or how you get that done.

Maybe some people misread my intentions about being revealing or maybe you thought I didn’t put a lot of thought into what I wrote before I wrote it. Trust me... I can be quite calculating and usually have a really good idea of what I want to say and why. Sometimes I don’t but it becomes very clear afterwards. If you are hung up on certain things or have some kind of investment in me, I advise you to get over that. I do try to be as equanimitous as possible, when possible. I try to be civil and not to forget the necessary self-deprecation and as for the latter... I’ve been in the company of real teachers and one doesn’t forget that or... if they do... they’ll get reminded in ways they won’t like; all for their own good of course.

Whether you do or do not take substances on occasion is none of my affair and whether I do is none of yours. You will note that I have been at pains all the while I have written here and elsewhere to advise against the use of substances or to tell people to think carefully about it. Under no circumstances do I recommend it to people because I don’t think most people can handle it. I’m not most people.

This is a dark and materialistic age. In another time ‘I’ might have no need for these things but given that the times are the times and given that carbon builds up on my engine much more quickly than it might in former times... I feel obliged to burn the carbon off... rev the headers.... Break the speed limit... subject myself to radical circumstances in order to see better. Sometimes it doesn’t work... most times it does.

My personal goal is to be free of all these things and there are protracted periods when I am. Others, like now... this is not the case.

On the subject of Ketamine, it’s a little offensive for people with zero awareness of the subject to lecture me on a condition they don’t have. Were you in my shoes you would be inclined to shut your mouths. I sincerely hope you are not in my shoes of late. I thought it was important to share some information with people because I don’t like hiding things or pretending to be something that I am not. Surely I can weave myth and mystery around myself but it would be a lie.

Try to remember that even though, in the ultimate sense, we are all the same person... I’m not you and you are not me. We are separated by time and distance. We are separated by experience and differing states of awareness. We may all be one but we are also not all one too. You can talk about the world not being real but if you bang your head into a wall it will hurt... even if it isn’t real. Talk is cheap.

So... though I respect your right to make any and all decisions for yourself, you must respect my right to do the same and refrain from offering me platitudes that I can quote as easily as you. Of course you are free to do this but you should consider how it will sound to me and how likely I am to run right out and buy the uniform and learn the secret handshakes.

We don’t talk about drugs here much and that will continue to be the case. However, we talk about most anything and so, most anything may come up on occasion. If it’s not your cup of tea I suggest you go have an espresso. Every one of us has weaknesses and shortcomings that should be our primary focus. The sooner we attend to them the less likely it is that we will be so aware of them in others. That’s said for me as well as you.

You’ve got a lot to think about in these coming months. A lot of things are going to happen and they are going to change your world. And I do need to point out that after God has his morning coffee (already in progress) he is first going to dispense some blessings and after that... after that... he is going to kick some ass.

Visible sings: The eponymous Les Visible Music Album♫ In That Shape Again ♫
'In That Shape Again' is track no. 8 of 10 on Visible's eponymous
'Les Visible' Music Album

Lyrics (pops up)

The eponymous Les Visible Music Album