Monday, November 22, 2004

Just Let It Go.

Just Let it Go

Yeah, just let it go. We’ve all heard about taking a deep breath. We’ve seen the movie where the woman presses her face into the strong mans shoulder and he says, “Go ahead, just let it all out... there...there. It’s going to be alright.” We might question whether it’s going to be alright, after all, her house might have burned down with everyone she knows in it. She might have just learned that she’s going to die soon. Then again, as soon as you let go, as soon as you let it all out it is going to be alright. The thing is, we don’t want to face the fact that everything changes, that the people ‘as we know them’ will pass on. We don’t want to live forever, to die daily, to change fundamentally and embrace the new. We don’t want that.

And so we have, the lies, the easy fixes, the distractions, all the vain ambitions that substitute for the real goal. We got bupkis. We got shit and we get shit because we want shit. Very few know how to or who it is that- turns shit into gold. Few make the connection between gold and the Sun. Few know what it means to shine or understand what shining does to the once tarnished interior. Few realize that all forms are condensed energy or that everything is made from sunlight. That’s what we are; light in extension.

You are moving through a world of illusion surrounded by lies. You are in The Twilight Zone and you don’t need to see the signpost up ahead. It’s actually some distance back. And boy, don’t we get upset at people when they tell us we are deceived and living in a world of illusion surrounded by lies. Lies are condensed energy too. In a garden, weeds grow up among the flowers. Lies are woven around and through truths. It takes skill to separate one from the other. More importantly it takes desire to want to. It takes courage to face and accept the things that will force you to change and become yourself.

Among the many sad ironies that drip down the mottled walls of the sad café is the illusion of popularity and the idea that popularity is somehow associated with veracity, ‘what’s happenin’, what’s valuable, what you need or whatever. The same stupid currency associations are made with success and fame. One of the things that get thrown at me a lot, usually from individuals in no position to throw anything is that; if I had anything to say I’d be rich and famous.

I’ve actually made a career of walking away from these things and the proof of that is in the biography. Donald Trump is rich and Donald Duck is famous. There is a fame that comes and it is accompanied by wealth. It is conferred upon the recipient by Nature. It is engineered behind the scenes by the mind which contains all of us as thoughts moving through it like fish. It may come early in life. It may come in the middle or at the end. It may come after one is gone. It is one of the fruits of desirous quest and one should prefer it in place of every counterfeit the world offers. Study the lives of the rich and famous. Look into their faces; observe their companions and what things they choose for celebration, consumption and entertainment. Look at what they must endure and who they have to hang out with. Think about it.

I am in fact quite rich although I doubt I would qualify as rich according to the ordinary gradations of measured assets. But I am rich nonetheless. I possess certain things that few people have. I possess some things, the existence of which is generally unknown. But more than that I enjoy, really enjoy, things that cost nothing. I also do not want most things. I have zero interest in 99.99999999 percent of the objects that can be desired or had. I can come and go at will. I know what to eat and how to make it taste good. I am free in ways that many do not even suspect the existence of. I could go on at length here but I’ll leave you to extrapolate on your own.

I won’t address the issue of fame although I could say quite a few things about that and whether or not I do in fact possess it and where. But that’s irrelevant. Only a fool seeks what passes for fame in this realm. You could compare it to walking around naked at night in the swamps of Andros Island, the jungle in Nihiku or any number of tropical locations. Possessing large amounts of wealth is attended by quite a few annoyances of its own, not to mention guaranteed physical illnesses that come with the territory.

One source of real wealth is the possession of good health all through your life, never going to doctors- not even to check; possessing already your own omniscient in-house physician. Real fame is moving through peoples lives and leaving sunlight in your wake- having your passage remembered while you yourself are forgotten, or at least, blurred in outline.

The lucky among us are not burdened with the needs of art or the responsibility of recording these things such as you see running past your eyes at this moment. Those who can live in the moment’s embodiment of the truth are the lucky ones. We in the trenches must needs face those across the wire, across the appearance of the razor wire. We in the caravan must needs hear the town dogs and bear the tomatoes upon the stage. It is to us to weave the catcalls into song, dance among the car horns and the thrusting lusts of the priapic appetites of the crowded landscapes, whirl the cape of fire to the side and dance beyond the flame, be beaten early and long for the sake of a tenderized heart, suffer every ignominy and false charge for the sheer joy of the opportunity to proclaim the undying, overwhelming, incomprehensible love that surrounds us on all sides; the face of the Sun and the angels that Durer caught so realistically in spiraled descent from the horn of vibrating light...all this and so much more make every calumny a caress.

You may hang by your fingers from the wall of your fear of the things you imagine are below can just let go. The ground is mere inches beneath your feet. That gulf before you may be so wide that it has no other side or it may only be as wide as your fear.

Yeah, just let go.


Anonymous said...

You're channeling voices from another star system. Good on you, great for some of us and impossible for most people to understand. I don't envy your job but I am so very glad you are here.

Abe Whittington

Anonymous said...

Ender made a big list designed along the usual divide and incite lines. Yours seemed to me to be the only name he left off the lists. Knowing him I am assuming that was the clue he wanted people to pick up on but no one did. You were on the front page a lot the last couple of days. Ender has successfully sent you packing and established his name as the freshest billboard messsage. I know you don't care but I thought you would be amused.

just call me Catallus

Visible said...

Howdy J.O. ...I hope one day I can get the opportunity to do those tunes in a real studio. There are glitches all through that early work; besides which I didn't sing anywhere near then what I do now.

Did I ever call you? It's strange to say that I have the memory of talking to both you and your wife but it seems that that can't have happened. Then I have to wonder why I didn't call. I usually do those sort of things just because they bug me until I have. Another mystery.

Yes...there are a number of interesting comestibles on those four 'Critical List' albums.

is your email still justoffal at that large portal?

Visible said...

I'd like to thank the academy and everyone who reads and responds here... for the support that goes some distance in respect of my continuing to do this sort of thing on a regular basis. I'll try to do this about 5 times a week- or until I hear from the Mother Ship.

As for references to and things that occur at Slate, I honestly don't much care about any of that any more. The fog is rolling in and blotting out the partial outlines of my faulty memory concerning whatever that was really all about. I miss some people from there and am also glad not to even be reminded of the existence of others who, strangely, don't even exist to begin with. It's one of those funny by-products of everything being in our heads.

Anonymous said...

If I don't get something new to read each day does that mean I have to read the piece from the day before as if it were new? I used to watch your TV show religiously.

Woodstock, NY
and NYC

Anonymous said...

The writing is great but we want to hear more songs. You have not put up any new songs in some months. It will not matter about the production just bang them out on the guitar. We will be waiting.

Viggo and Smilla, your Soundclick friends from Stockholm

Anonymous said...

Because of your regretably tedious pieces on those posting forums I felt obliged to go and check out the place(s). Are you out of your mind? What were you doing over there? I am glad to see that you have regained your self-respect.
I have the greatest admiration for your unique abilities. You are one of those few people who are much better than the quite good people to whom they are compared. Those incestuous pieces on your tortured journey through cyber-suburbia are not to be considered among your best work and I'd delete them if I were you.
I realize you are mooning the Philistines but the Philistines don't get it to begin with. Do you compute?
It is more than enough that you channel the genius that is yours and ignore the canaille and the rabble underfoot. Giving them notice elevates them. It's perfectly okay to piss on them but it is unnecessary to call it to their attention.
Otherwise let me add my voice to the chorus of appreciative minds. You make my blood sing and my heart most gratefully light.

Alan Winstone (I've written you before about your music; letting you know that the reference to Kennsington in the song "Death is Calling my Name" might not be your most accurate choice- I live in Kennsington at Queensgate.) Thanks for the email heads-up about the blog. I've had a delightful several afternoons.

Anonymous said...

all that spiritual stuff may be good for you but that's not the world the rest of us live in. Get real.

Bruce Smith

Anonymous said...

JustOffal, word has it that IOZ is Chango which might explain a good many things. There are some strange things happening at the moment. Your point didn't make it into your post here either.


Visible said...

Howdy M.

I'm doing just fine, movin and groovin, jabbin and hookin and generally staying out of the way of the wide load estrogen-pissed BaldTony's on the highway. Not quite as hard as playing chess with a milk cow.

My daughter lives in Maine. There's some beautiful land up there but they do get the mosquitos and deer flies. Now though you can build a unit that affixes to the top of your house and will keep two acres totally clear. Technology has it's good points.

It's great to interact with you. I'll try to get an email off soon. I owe a lot of people and it's getting seriously backed up. Ah well.

You and your fine companion have yourselves a wonderful Thanksgiving. I know you will becasuse you possess real gratitude. I have to shake my head at the clueless twits that call it turkey day as if it were just an appetite celebration...or are they celebrating being turkeys?



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