Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The Stained Glass Personality

We’ve all got a personality. It’s like having hands, or a brain. It’s a part of us. It’s the lens through which our being shines or... not. When someone mentions the personality we know what they are talking about but it could be that we still don’t know what it is. Often we judge and measure people according to their personality. That is similar to associating the person with the clothes that they wear. We might not like the color or the style. It might not be something we would wear. However it is not the body beneath it. The personality is not what is behind it either.

The personality is evidence of the state of mind of the person behind the personality. The personality is also like an animal and some people have more control over it than others. Some personalities are more difficult to control than others. We have different crosses to bear even though they are all the same cross.

There are a lot of branches of scientific inquiry that treat with the definition of the human state; psychology and psychiatry and others. Religion has its various conjectures. Metaphysics has a number of schools of thought that all talk about the divisions of being. You hear about mind and ego and super ego and Id. You hear about the physical body and the spiritual body and the astral body and the mental body. There are all kinds of terms floating around and different ideas of how many bodies there are and what they do.

There was a time in my life when I studied these things. I had a burning desire to know what it all meant and what was hidden behind what was hidden behind what was hidden behind whatever was in front of me.

I studied all of the religions and took extremely powerful psychedelic agents as well as everything else that was available. For a time I stayed in a state of strict bramacharya; not just physically and for a time I plunged into the maelstrom of sensation. Then there was a long period of back and forth with the agonizing pull of what is best left unnamed and best left undefined. There’s no escaping the pull and the pain once contact has been made.

Most people go through very common stages of life and then there are two basic sorts of people going through these stages. Some people are spiritually inclined and some are materially inclined and in the early portion of life people tend to be more idealistic and flexible, just as their bodies are more flexible. There is a period of discovery and then paths that are chosen and discarded until a personal decision or unavoidable circumstance determines a course. Very few people put aside all career and familial concerns in order to pursue the spiritual unknown. Of that number, very few can continue for long. It is the most arduous of choices because it demands that one confront something over and over and over again where the easier course is just to fall asleep and dream some little dream; or some big dream.

Breaking out of the dream-weavers spell is impossible without help and that is as it should be. Actually breaking out rather than assuming you have broken out is as rare as a banker’s tears. It may be a greater liability to assume that you have broken out than to just be caught in a dream. There is this tendency to want to become a teacher of others and there is only one. It is impossible to become that teacher and there are many unpleasant ways to learn this truth. It is possible to sit in the presence of this teacher and it may be that something which happens between you and this teacher might help others but that isn’t your concern. You only get in the way and that is precisely what it is; getting in the way or getting out of the way. The personality is a real liability here. It likes to operate on it’s own but it only shines when it is in the hands of the master. Our personalities need to become like stained glass windows through which the light shines. Even many considered high beings have dark spots in places and it isn’t something you can attend to personally.

All over the world and all over the cyber-world are individuals who are presenting their version of the truth through the lens of their personality. Here is one amusing site and it has also spawned anti-sites.

It can be amusing to Google variations on this theme and see what you find. I know people in this theater of operation and I have met some of the teachers you may have heard about and some that are unknown. I have met some who make it certain in my mind that I will never become such a person because they are so far past anything I might have to offer that I feel like a flashlight in search of the sun. I don’t know if that makes any sense but it sounds good (grin).

Just because we may never be a high mucky muck (God help us) does not mean we cannot be useful. To be useful is a wonderful thing and so long as we realize the interfering nature of our personality and the subtle devil that is the mind, we might actually be useful on occasion.

I’ve always had difficulties in spiritually based communities. So many people want to be like the man on the dais who may not even have a clue himself. I have seen where people with obvious power have been brought low by pedestrian human desires and then had the task of rationalizing it within the parameters of their presumed divinity. This is a task they are equal to (grin).

It should go without saying (but it never does) that those who serve best are as humble as ground water and often not recognizable as anyone special or unique. They are just so grateful to be of use that it never even enters their mind that they are worthy of notice and it is highly unlikely that they would get into setting up foundations or setting forth to add their commentary to the greater confusion of the world. Sometimes it happens that people will come and it also happens that something forms around these people but it is not something they desire or get too involved in.

Mastering the personality is more difficult than climbing mountains because we have no mountains like it to climb. Reining in one’s own compulsions is a mightier accomplishment than commanding armies; amassing billions of dollars, having Tom Cruise as your houseboy, or any challenge the world might set. It is no wonder that so few are drawn to this effort. And who will applaud? The entire natural and supernatural universe will applaud but it won’t be on TV. No... you can’t do it yourself and that should come as really good news.

Every time I come across these physical locations and cyber-worlds of spiritual commerce it puts a rueful smile on my mouth and it also makes me sad. I really wish there was somewhere I could go and put my personality in the shop and have the technicians take care of the details but I haven’t found that place yet. Everything else you can have repaired, except maybe a broken heart and time technicians deal with that. Everything else you can buy but you can’t buy this.

You’re on your own buddy but... as I said; the good news is that you can’t do it by yourself. This is only important, or relevant, or interesting to the people that it concerns. Even if it is out of our hands we still have to walk the distance, even if it is only in our minds.

Visible sings: God in Country by Les Visible♫ Just Like a River ♫
'Just Like a River' is track no. 9 of 11 on Visible's 2001 album 'God in Country'
Lyrics (pops up)

God in Country by Les Visible

6 comments:

kikz05 said...

:)

Ben There said...

(having some issues posting a comment. this is attempt #2. if attempt #1 worked, please just delete this one.)

In my experience this spiritual thing is cyclical (what isn't?). There are really nice episodes of tranquility and progress where spiritual practice is an utterly enjoyable experience and then there are other times when unseen forces seem to be working against me at every turn. They are probably beings of my own creation (maybe different facets of my personality?) but they do seem to take over at times. I haven't figured out if it's just a matter of will power or focus or if it really is out of my control and I am powerless except for the ability to just observe it patiently.

Thanks for the essay.

Visible said...

Several people have written me to say that their comments are not showing up. Sometimes blogger has a problem. If you find that you cannot make your comment appear then email it to me and I will post it for you since I don't seem to have a problem at my end.

susannah said...

Your (grinning) is about the only light reaching this somewhat cracked and dusty stained glass. Keep it up.

Visible said...

New essay here;

http://zippittydodah.blogspot.com/

Visible said...

New piece here as well-

http://visible-stream-of-consciousness.blogspot.com/