Dog Poet Transmitting.......
May your noses always be cold and wet.
Is it Origami time again? Why, I guess it is. Things have mellowed out considerably here, although my sense of detachment continues. I'm in a state of suspension, like a piece of fruit in a Jell-O mold; interesting image, that. It's true though. I feel a sense of apartness from everything around me, as if I were watching a movie, alone in a dark theater. It's what passes for real life, up there on the screen but, try as I might, I cannot escape into the screen and become a part of the action I am watching. I am consistently aware that I am sitting there in the theater.
It all goes back to my kundalini experience. Prior to that, I still never felt like I was enough of a part of things to get lost in them but there were periods where I could integrate for brief periods of time and I'll admit, it wasn't unpleasant. However, after the kundalini experience, I've just been outside of it all. People would engage me in conversations about esoteric things and all I ever heard was their adaptation of whatever they wanted to believe was true, insofar as it supported whatever they wanted to believe, to the extent that it supported what they wanted to do or to get. I watched people adjust their philosophies and points of view, so that whatever it was that they imagined the cosmos to be, it was a willing foundation for all of their speech and actions. I don't want to sound cynical, it's just how it always looked to me. This was echoed in whatever my invisible friends would tell me, in the process of my observation and listening.
Back in the day, when so many transformative things were happening, there was a willingness and a risk taking among so many people that I knew. It was that window of youth, where you think you are going to live forever and there's no long residue of the past to drag you down, or demand your regular attention to contemplate all that happened, or that you thought happened. No serious ties that bind were yet in place, except for maybe the blood ties of family. That's one of the things that happened to me when the kundalini experience went down. All of a sudden my family was no longer my family. My father was no longer my father, my mother was no longer my mother, my brothers and my sister no longer that either. The totality of humanity replaced that and those roles were filled by anyone that I was around.
Prior to the experience, I had an identity; a composite of ideas about myself and who I was. As the force rose inside of me, the first thing it did was to suck that identity right out of me. I was no one. I went upstairs to the bathroom and looked into the mirror and I saw face after face, from many periods of time pass over my features. From that time on, I felt the features of whoever I was with come into the mental image of my face in my mind. It still happens. That has never changed. It's been a major protection many times because there are no filters between me and whoever's company I am in. The exceptions have been when things were hidden from me for the purpose of demonstration. You can't have lessons imposed on you if you see them coming (grin).
My life has been a relentless struggle to the point of the moment I presently occupy and resident within it, is the prospect of not knowing where I am going to be in the none too distant future. The mind wants to spend a lot of time on this, accomplishing Jack Nothing. This is what the mind likes, chasing it's own tale round and round in circles because it loves to be the center of attention. It can only achieve this by never getting to the point, which resolves and dissolves it, so that it can actually become a functioning asset instead of an implacable liability; solve et coagula.
The mind is a rapacious beast or the seat of angels. They don't come around in the former and lacking the former, there is only the latter. The latter is the destiny of perseverance. The former is the essential origin of suffering.
I've had serious ups and downs, far more threatening and occasionally devastating than anything I face now but the mind and the heart are always most deeply engaged in the concerns of the present, regardless of how they stack up against anything that might have been present in the past. In every situation, I have always been looked out for and it has always worked out and it has always progressed into a better state than it was prior to. This I know as a result of simple reflection. The mind doesn't want to cooperate in respect of this because it takes away from the mind's power to orchestrate attachments and emotional responses to whatever it is overemphasizing.
Why am I talking about these things today? I've been getting a constant influx of emails from people going through intense changes and desperate circumstances. Various levels of darkness, despair and uncertainty are presenting themselves in the lives of many readers. I'll mention here what I tell everyone in different ways. Evil is being forced outward into manifestation, from the hearts and minds of those who harbor it. Meanwhile the good is being pressed out of the hearts and minds of those who harbor it and these people are being tried and tempered in a crucible of fire. If you could see the actual happenings from an objective and apart perspective, you wouldn't have it any other way. Unfortunately, in most cases, we can't see the end point from the point we are momentarily occupying. This makes us insecure. “Why is this happening to me? I'm a good person. I worked so hard. I don't do bad things”. That's your opinion (grin).
Seriously, it's not about whether you are a good or bad person, or think you are. It goes further and deeper than that. It's about the desired results in the mind of the cosmos. Let us think of ourselves as a metal pot or a musical instrument. Some pots are simple in function and design and do not require painful and complex processes to come to completion, in order to be sufficient to the task that is set for them. Some containers are more multifarious and require complex and torturous steps to get them to the final state.
Some musical instruments demand sophisticated bending and shaping of the wood or metal. From these instruments a vast range of subtleties and sounds can be brought forth. Some instruments are quite simple and the range of notes of which they are capable is limited and often, so is the quality and depth of the voicing. That is how it is with human beings as well. We are not all the same, no matter what anyone tells you. There is a perspective from which this assumption can be made but even that is not what people think it is ...because people are thinking and you definitely can't see it from the position of thinking. As I've said before, the spirit of the cosmos sings through everyone but sometimes it carries a tune.
Getting all bent out of shape by the things you are seeing and going through, has zero impact on the positively transformative side of the equation, if anything, it retards your progress. We run hither and yon, bemoaning all the doors we seek to have opened and which remain closed to us. The simple truth is that we are holding those doors closed and so long as we are leaning on the doors, they will not open. We don't believe we are doing this. The fact is that we must be doing it because otherwise those doors would open.
We bemoan that we cannot perform certain actions, or that we are creatively blocked and can't get into the strategic posture, where the water just flows without interruption. Yet we do not trouble to go to the particular agent of that activity or state and make the sincere request that will draw the entity to our side and succor. The universe is far more efficient and complex than the finest Swiss watch that was ever made and- unlike that watch-, it's conscious. It knows what you want and what you are up to. The problem is that a particular back and forth of communication is not taking place. Instead there is a one sided argument and that argument goes on day and night. That argument has been going on for so long that most people are unaware that it is even taking place. One has to sink beneath the level at which the argument is taking place and the argument will dissolve and cease to be. It is like finally being able to operate outside the realm of personality, at which point you cease to be in conflict with anyone else. It is only on that level where conflict takes place in the first place.
If you want to understand why you are being put through all of this painful stuff... it is in order to assist in extricating you from the place where all of these things happen. Why you are having no success with it is because you are trying to accomplish it on your own. You can't. That's not your job. Your job is not to interfere with the one whose job it actually is.
'Where You Are' is track no. 6 of 12 on Visible's 2007 album 'Color Ball'
Lyrics (pops up)