Friday, January 08, 2010

Things to Come and the Perfect Storm.

Well, I am in the soup again and make no mistake about that. Most appropriately the wind is howling outside my door. Perhaps it is the wolf. It might be the wolf given what I have experienced in the last couple of days.

I got an email telling me my sweetie was dead and I got some posts to that effect as well. Unfortunately I couldn’t reach Susanne by phone until late in the night of a day that started early. I called the town police but couldn’t get an answer. There’s no crime there. I should have called the larger town but I was befuddled to put it mildly. By now I was sure she was dead.

I had to get dog food and I had no money and then I found that none of my cards would work. This seemed to play into the general aura of the thing. Then I found about 30 Euro in change which I keep in the car for driving and never think about otherwise so, the dogs are okay.

I don’t know how many of you rely on the other side of your life like I do but suffice it to say that this came as a tremendous blow. It was coming from so many directions at the same time that it just had to be true. Let’s add in that last week Susanne told me she was having dreams about dying. She’s so much younger than I that I found that mystifying. She had stopped smoking and was doing all the right things and I happen to know that stopping smoking can be as bad as doing it; shock to the system and all of that. This was all swirling in the air and I can always reach her usually but not this time.

So I had to live with this thing which even a couple of astrologers told me might happen and I couldn’t believe it but I knew it had to be true by this time. It’s like all of the air and light in my life just disappeared in a puff of smoke. I thought to myself that I had only been holding on with a couple of fingers anyway and now I wasn’t holding on at all. She’s the anchor of my life and things just don’t work without her and then I thought, if she’s gone what about her mother; what about the dogs?

I couldn’t accept that it was true so I held off going batshit crazy and I probably couldn’t anyway. I already went batshit crazy at least a dozen times before and I wasn’t sure I had any batshit crazy left in me. I knew there were deep pools of remorse and regret waiting for me but I’ve managed to avoid swimming there because that is no kind of place for an already depressed personality. I figure God is going to probably be kinder to me than I am. I treat myself pretty bad on the best of days. Some injuries are very hard to overcome and my childhood was a nightmare. That might be why I am still only 12 years old.

When I heard Susanne’s voice on the phone I felt like an incandescent light. Maybe it was going to come on and maybe it wasn’t. I was already dead in ways too numerous to count. I don’t like being alive. I often wish I was dead and I take no pleasure in just about anything. I like my succulents and I like the fauna that I wind up with somehow too but I don’t enjoy it here and so I am probably lying to you to a lot of the time. No... I really believe the things I tell you and they keep me going so... I’m probably not lying but I think I come off sounding stronger than I am.

I never asked to get so many readers and now I feel responsible for you too. If I’m not strong and steady then I feel like you might not be either. I realize that that sounds pretty arrogant and I apologize for that. I’m not thinking very clearly right now so I could say anything. The wind is supremely howling outside the door. Susanne called a moment ago and then all the electricity went off. I walked outside to talk to her and this big wheel of a table top that I had put up against the wall of the house just spun around in front of me and rolled right past the car. I stepped on both dogs at least once because they were so excited... but not afraid so I know there’s an excess of ozone.

Now I’m stuck in Italy with no money and I’m going to have to figure that out. I will so don’t get worked up about it on your end. Thousands of Germans are experiencing this. Someone hacked into the main system and so it goes. Paypal is useless and I don’t have an account in this country. As far as they know I’m not even here. I’ve made low profile a lifestyle. Only one country in Europe has me on the books because you have to be on the books somewhere unless you are a real Rosicrucian and I’m still a quart low in that department.

Life is pain and some of us transform our suffering into art and some of us make it an art to abuse our fellows. We never have enough of the one and always too much of the other. I’ve come to a place where I’m not afraid of anyone one on one or maybe even if they brought their friends but I think I might still be afraid of personal loss; not that anything actually belongs to me. I know that. I’ve lost everything more than once already. It doesn’t get easier when you get older. When you’re young you laugh at death and risk is a rite of passage.

I’m not sure that I am doing you or myself much good with these blogs. They occupy my life and it’s all without return and I could just as well be making a living; if that’s what you call it. I promised myself that I would give myself away and never be like everyone else who is always out for themselves. If anything pissed me off in life it was selfishness and self interest. The single quality that all of my real friends have is a lack of both. I would die for them and they know that. I count the value of my life based on what I would spend it on and friendship and brotherhood are supreme among my values. I probably would have made a good soldier but they kicked me out for being sane.

The reason I am writing this post is that I am going to have to rethink a lot of things. I can’t think right now because I am too fucked up but eventually I will be un-fucked. This is one of the many reasons that I know there is a God. Given what I have done to myself it is amazing I can still walk, much less the antics I pull off on my deck when I feel like it. Surely God makes this possible and I look at those who could be my grandchildren and they are slugs that can’t dance and I don’t think God is a priority for them either. I think God is the last thing on their mind. It shows.

Everything shows eventually. I’m going to try to keep doing this but I am very mercurial at the moment and I don’t know who is going to be thinking in my head later on. I’ve written so much I really don’t need to write anymore but somehow a lot of us are connected and I don’t want to chickenshit out on the right thing to do.

I guess I just want to say that I’m not half as noble or courageous as a lot of you think I am. I’m just one more determined soul walking toward something I can’t see. I have to clench my teeth and I have to drive on when there seems no point in doing so. Where did it get me? It got me where I am right now and I have no idea where that is. It’s like all the places I’ve been and passed through and all those lives and names that have nothing to do with right now but maybe they are stepping stones on the way and I will admit to that. I’m not despairing or giving up. It’s not in my nature. God alone can beat me down or retard my passage and no one else or all the armies on Earth could do that.

But is can get scary and I think it is going to do that. You should step outside my door right now and check it out. I’ve had this place for four years now and I have never seen anything like this. The air is crackling. It is electric.

I‘ve run out of steam and I think I’ll just watch one of my movies or plug in the keyboard and howl at the coming night. I’m just like you my friends; god keep us safe.


ZHP said...

Les, It's the Tiger coming in, auspicious for dogs, but when things happen it's all in a rush.

I had a friend who was a tiger/scorpio and he was an intense and exciting personality. He was one of the few people I could actually observe the astrological signs playing out.

You will be O.K. We'll be alright. You're catching the first waves...

Zoner said...

There is no debt here, in either direction. You give, we give back - it is as it should be, and without expectation.

Friendship and brotherhood is what is found here, with precious little exception. Gratitude abounds, and you have touched many of us deeply in these interesting times. My wish is that the strength you have given to so many will be returned to you in your times of difficulties.

I know we are all in good hands. That's the only thing that makes our time here bearable when the outside intrudes too much on the internal.

As you have said many times, simply endure. If only it were truly simple.

With love and deep respect,


Anonymous said...

I was thinking about you a lot lately praying for you if that is the right word.I too do not have much to offer silver or gold even but what I offer is more than that and that is by the power of God through the Christ you will get up and walk Les the beauty of it all is that you know it and I do too.


Anonymous said...

Les, Suzannes dreams may be a side effect of a medication used to quit smoking. I have many friends who have used it and they all complain about bizarre dreams.

Anonymous said...

Something is coming my way today'ish.

If you need me to see Mr Western Union or whatever you got there, you have my email at Shangril-La. Send appropriate details.

Gotta keep that space probe charged.


Visible said...

Susanne is major league stoic. She doesn't use any medications of any kind.

moon said...

Hey Les, stop wining will you please. It is the first time in years you deside to take a peak outside your front house door, what you are hearing now and seeing now is the some of what you where missing when you where "plugged" this is how it feels to be unplugged...Ghaza boys live this day in day out...
Get un-f****d soon,

Visible said...

Turey, I'll be okay. I've got good credit with good people close by. None of them are home now but they will be. Thank you though. It means a lot.

Anonymous said...

I've read here a long time, emailed once for a PDF .. I understand you get a lot of volume, so while disappointed not to receive the gift, understood.

You've touched me deeply and would be missed if you stopped transmitting. Your pretty well The One that I read, get and synchronize with. And yet, we've never spoken.


Pstonie said...

"The things you own end up owning you."

I would say for me personally it was the link to the HPH reports as the dog poet which led to me expect a blinding realisation of truth when I came here, and then found it frustrating when I didn't encounter a flash-in-the-pan enlightenment.

What I learned is that if someone on earth had all the answers they wouldn't be on earth. We're all stuck here in some way and the best we can do is help each other out.

Another thing I'm pretty sure of is that each person's enlightenment is in their hands and their hands alone. We all have different methods of chasing up truth, and one guy's revelation might not mean much to another. So at best again, we could only help each other.

Just as helpful to me as your posts, arguably, has been the comments in them from readers. We're all here looking for the same thing, and some know more than others.

I don't want to speculate too much about your synchronised personal hardships, but if someone is actively trying to destroy you then you're probably doing something right in this world.

psychegram said...

Thank God Susanne is OK. Not that I've ever met her or interacted with her in any way of course but ... tragedy is always tragic, and I know that feeling when you hear a voice on the phone from someone you were starting to worry was dead.

People are obviously fucking with you.

It's the Mayan Trecena of flint, which to them was both knife and mirror. The knife can be used to kill or heal, the mirror to see the world or yourself. Started five days ago and eight left to go ... it's generally a hard fortnight, I understand.

Like it or not my friend you have become a symbol, an avatar. We trust you and that's become a rare thing. Do I personally believe everything you say? Well, no, of course not. You're a man, just a man, as fallible and human as any of us. The reason I trust you is that I know you will never deliberately lie, about the world or (what's more important) yourself. Your influence on my life has been incalculable and overwhelmingly positive. And not just my life.

I love you, man, and I know I'm not just speaking for myself there. If that's worth anything at all (and I know it doesn't always seem like it is) well then ... shit ... I know it's not much but it's all I have to give. And whether I'm sitting here typing it in a comment in one of your blogs or not, it's not something I ever stop feeling.

Pstonie said...

I forgot to mention, but I've often heard death in dreams is inverted. So someone new might be arriving if this is true as people say. Maybe it's just the personification of your troubles that joined you. ;)

Visible said...

Psychegram you are a prince, I love all of you and I expect you know that.

Mondo email me and I will send you the PDF. I am sure it was an accident.

BillK said...

Hi Les,

The shit's hitting the fan and the only thing keeping me sane(?) is the knowledge that there's a power greater than me that has it all figured out.

Knowing you through your work is a blessing. I run the gauntlet of greater than to less than emotions. I'm not unique in this regard. Sandy is my companion in this life. I can't imagine life without her. I'm glad that Suzanne is ok. Since Pay Pal is unreliable, how can I help?

I love you Les.

reenie said...

I like you just the way you are. Susanne is ok and the universe will provide, it always does to good people and you are good people.

Sometimes you can be lost and we are here for you, many of us love you, can you feel it?


mick said...

To Whichever Deity it May Concern --

Les Visible has significantly helped me by spending a substantial part of his time on Earth writing his blogs.

I volunteer to pay for one of his sins ( your choice ) for every week he keeps posting.

----------------------- Mick Richfield .

Les -- If I had a force-field, I would lend it to you.

Publius said...

Les, as a poet your Ars Poetica has been heard around the world. Please accept this poem in turn as thanks:

Pluck The Day

Don't seek, my friend, we cannot say
what end's in store for you, for me:
don't trust in vague astrology,
Better to shoulder what will be,
whether you soon will die, or stay
to watch the shore exhaust the sea.
So drink some wine while your hours flee,
put small trust in posterity,
and prune your hopes; but pluck the day.

Visible said...

Thank you, all of you but will work it out. God provides and my trust in that cannot be measured it has been proven too many times to doubt it.

I'm more concerned about deepdarkblue which I have not heard from and if you want to help someone help her.

Visible said...

Nicely done Publius.

Anonymous said...

From these rocky mountain tops and river canyons I am poised to lead the weary pilgrim children of the most high, and most of you don't know that I am. I know real anonymity because the whole world is lost. It's why I never wrote a second book. I tried to warn everyone as best as possible of the times now on us but it was always "get back to me later" and "what can I do?". Not that I know what to say but if I had to figure it out for myself, why would someone else be different, and they-we are not. Fate and Destiny collide and Truth only remains. So imagine the astonishment of the moment, that you are still able to suffer and be purified. Rejoice to know the pristine uniqueness of infinite being and eternal-ness. That...meddize does not know death.

Anonymous said...

ayi nanda-tanuja kinkaram
patitam mam visame bhavambudhau
krpaya tava pada-pankaja-
sthita-dhuli-sadrsam vicintaya

O son of Maharaja Nanda (Krishna), I am Your eternal servitor, yet somehow or other I have fallen into the ocean of birth and death. Please pick me up from this ocean of death and place me as one of the atoms of Your lotus feet.

Anonymous said...

peace be upon you brother Les..

A few words for you:
Dear Brother Les..
U r not alone in this emptyness..
we are all lost in this wilderness..
Look within to find the happiness..
I pray that you continue in your craziness..
For it is only your blogs expressiveness...
that today we wait in eagerness...
for the end of evilness..

I would not worry about thing if i were you..we are always tested after short intervals by the see wether we are are in the spotlight i have no doubt for a reason...the reason is to grow..and help others grow in conviction...I have been following you for a year now..and I have seen some weird things too..awake and sleeping..the fact is that some crazy stuff is going on..God lives in the mirror of the heart..which has been broken into a million why save it..lets break it into pieces..
may the lord have mercy on all our souls..

kikz said...

a year ago today, i was in the eye of a storm.

waiting in scot rite children's hosp, wandering in/out of the chapel and the halls.. fending off bothersome vibes and inquisitive intrusion from this pole/catholic nun that floats 'round the place like some specter from the land of the damned...

one of my twin daughters was lying somewhere in the cold, back splayed open like a fillet... pins/rods of baby, 14. the sweetest, most loving, most empathetic of my 3.

would she be taken from me? would she live? would she be whole? would she walk? would she ever be normal again?

never been kissed, never driven a car.. never done so many of the things we all look back on as milestones in our lives...

that was a hard were there for me, then...and 3 wks later, when we had to go back for another wk, w/a problem.

i needed advice on dealing w/the invisible demons howling in my mind.
thank you... again.

the eye of your storm will pass soon... and the winds 'll pick back up as the other side passes... then it'll all be ok.

its just your time in the hurricane.

don't know what i can do for you.. but know i'm here..

Erik said...

Dear Les and All,

I was gutted when I first read about Suzanne's and your troubles. I am very glad she's OK. You also seem to find your 'warrior' spirit back again, thank God!

To you and all the beautiful souls that visit here and have helped me through dire straits:

I love you all!!


Rebel 4E said...

Big Love Vis (-___-)

I look forward to each new post you make, Reflections/Mirrors/Origami or Consciousness...

But Hey!
We all need a break sometimes.

Take it easy dude..And if you can`t take it easy ...take it easy as you can.


Django said...

As someone who is, it seems, farther along the trail than I, you have helped me enormously. Thanks.
Whether you decide to keep on or not, you have my love and respect.

Anonymous said...

Sending positive thoughts and energy your way!

I am so glad we're all in this together. That even though most of us will never meet, we share the same ultimately beautiful world.


Anonymous said...

When I quit smoking, I dreamt of finding a lit cigarette next to my driver's license inside a pocket of my purse. I knew I was losing my identity of being a smokier. It's a head trip, alright. Good luck to Susanne.

If you were perfect, solid and strong, Les, you would't be Real and none of us would relate or love you the way we do.

I love the part in the Velveteen Rabbit when the Rabbit is asking the Skin Horse what is Real? The Skin Horse tells the Rabbit Real is how you are made .... it's a thing that happens to you.

"When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt? asked the Rabbit."

"Sometimes, said the Skin Horse. When you are Real, you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up or bit by bit, asked the Rabbit."

"It doesn't happen all at once said the Skin Horse. You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen to people who break easily or have sharp edges or have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, your hair has been loved off and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But those things don't matter at all because once you are Real, you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

The Velveteen Rabbit, by Margery Williams

Anonymous said...

you know what les
this week I felt the same
spending energy
on obstacles in the way
leaves us feeling
out in the cold
been here before
it always resolve
pick our selves up
as we always do
job to be done
people need truth
for the lies the
leader's spread each day
for the wickedness
they practice and
evil they display
for all them people
that the wicked starve to death
or the murdering of innocents
that they are supposed to protect
this world we live in
completely confused
the truth I would say
completely abused
the system we abide by
was never their to protect
it was to steal from the poor
to give to the elect
it cant go on
look where its led
broken feilds and meadows
and sea's no respect
so it must end
thats its course
by the sun,the moon
and the stars and the source


abe said...

The huitzil is upon you my friend. The Toltecs and Aztecs share a deity whose name is one but whose natures are as different as any duality one can imagine. Tezcatlipoca the Nahua(Mesoamerican) word for the smoking mirror. The Totltec deity under this name had another title, his first name - Mixcoatl. The Cloud Serpent was symbolic of our Spiral Galaxy, and the Sun was its mirror whose solar radiation reached the Earth a smoke. This was given off in cycles that became the 260 day calendar. The Aztec version of this deity was the Historic founder of the Mexica nation. The Aztec smoking mirror (Huitzilopochtli) was the chaos expelled from the creator's infinite possibilities. This founder was a magician and warrior who instituted idolatry and human sacrifice in the name or power. He is the living face of illusion, temptation, and represents the triumph of our fears. To the Toltecs, Ometeotl was God. This word is synonymous with the Chinese concept of Yin/Yang - the duality of existence. It also symbolized the duality of chance and will - or freedom and fate. The emergence of existence creates inexistence by default. This was called Mictlan. Fear arises from the realization of non-existence, and from fear comes ignorance (the codification of our fears), from which comes superstition (the placation of our fears), from which arises illusion - the triumph of our fears. You my friend are the day keeper gazing at the Tonalamatl (Book of Days). You success depends on you yourself staring in to the Tezcatlipoca and conquering the illusions that present themselves before you. May the chance and will at work in our shared existence bless you and yours. May the Holy Spirit of wisdom and charity(Quetzal Coatl) rest upon you in the trials to come as it did on Christ and Ce Acatl. May the Holy Spirit of Courage and Kinship (Itz Papalotl) be your guide and loving Mother as well in the year to come. One love for all - and no love is not weak. It is our love for the poor, oppressed, and indigenous that will conquer that old hate of they that serve two masters.

Anonymous said...

I've read that dreams about dying also have to do with recreating yourself, an end to a behavior/habit, or a new lifestyle. I'm glad your lady is okay.
I hope the shitbags who sent you those messages will someday see the light.
Your art is your service to humanity. You are doing what you feel and certainly that is guided by love. Love what you do and success will........
The sun is supposedly experiencing a lack of activity and strange magnetics putting Britain in a deep freeze. The rest of the world too.
A good thing to remember is that life and emotion comes in waves and for every depression their is a crest. If you can just stay afloat you'll ride out the storm.
You put yourself out there-- on the web-- you should expect some abuse. You are writing about sensitive subjects-- THE MOST SENSITIVE. Not too many people are willing to write about spirituality and "the zism."
Hang in there buddy--- MUD
Werd v: compas

nina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

These are going to be very challenging times ahead. The illusions will be of body, mind and spirit. The battle will be fought on all fronts. We must pull together and form a spiritual testudo. With that formation the Romans were able to take on oppossing forces that outnumbered them 10 to 1. It means that we all protect one another as well as ourselves.

Les, I no I speak for myself as well as many others, but if we can help we will. Maybe, some form of guest editorial or similar. We are there for you becuase you have been there for us more than you can imagine. Your writings have been a lifeline of truth in age of of lies and deception. YOur blogs have become a home. We all have our choirs to do.

We stand together or we fall alone.

it is a bright sunny day with clear skies here in Colorado. A rare thing of late.

One day we will gather and break bread and share stories from the many fronts.


Amicus for Life!

wv: creed

SouthernHungary said...

Les-Dont even think about quitting now! You are a much needed voice of sanity and your "mission" is only over when "HE" decides.Stay strong and true for we are all here in the same boat searching for new horizons-steady at the helm captain!

Nayon said...

For the first time in my life, yesterday I've hand written a letter to god, resembling very much your present blog. I figured I might get lucky like Neile D. Walsch but to no avail, the silence was deafning. It seems pretty clear we didn't come on this plane to enjoy life, we didn't get those hamster's head and heart everyone is carrying around. Unfortunatly we are sensitive loving spiritual beings. So either we are masochist, or someone had something in mind for us, and I sincerly hope for the latter. In your case, it is obvious, you've already done your deed by being a glorious light around the world and you have inspired untold number of God's loving children. I still have to figure out about that little candle light I have that nobody wants, and I want to thank you for helping me staying lit over the last five years at least. Together we stand, divided we fall. So if you feel a little mouse under you trying to help you walk in those difficult times, it might just be the best of my Love I'm sending you from over the ocean.

Anonymous said...

go talk to the German Shephard, he's a wise old dog and may have a message for you Les.

abel said...

Hi Les,
I've had a few scares like that, my wife travels alot often to remote areas around the world. There have been a few times that we have not had contact for weeks and my mind constructed her demise - with the same result of my shriveling up inside. Our minds - or what controls them - are the enemy.
I had a dream early this morning, the jets screamed over and dropped bombs with parachutes that opened and dropped boomlets that smoked and filled the woods with poison. We tried to survive.
I personally need your observations to keep me on track - "be at peace, God is in control"
Peace, Al B.

Odin's Raven said...

Yes, that's a nice poem. It's been well known for a long time. Let's acknowledge it's author - Horace.

Darquestarr said...

Glad to hear your lady is OK, Les...or, at least, not dead. Kickin' nicotine can be a bitch. Stay strong, brother. You are a true disciple as per the PDF you sent, which I thank you for, once again.


Hank said...

Why is it that so many of histories most beautiful and talented souls have been tortured. Perhaps that is the price one pays for being aware of the divine and the nature of life on planet earth, at the same time. It is difficult to reconcile the beauty of the one with the ugliness of the other. I too am tortured with trying to accomplish this reconciliation my friend, and have wondered many times why I am still here. Except for those few that would miss me, I would not lament moving on.

But since I cannot justify taking away what the creative force has given me, I am here and must believe there is a reason for that.

Learning is what always comes to mind when I seek to determine the nature of that reason. Like you, I sometimes...well..many times don't know how valuable something or someone is to me until I am faced with it or them not being there. Many times we suffer losses without having taken advantage of opportunities to share with those we lose just what their value to us is.

I have to say that the thought of you stopping what you do, and not being there struck me in a way I did not expect, so let me take advantage of this opportunity.

In you I have found a kindred soul. Someone who has been a talisman for unlocking knowledge beyond my hopes or expectations. I have shared with you, and the others that come here because of you, things I have never shared with anyone, and have enriched myself as a result. I have become more because of you and what you have chosen to share. You have my respect, my admiration, my love and my thanks and if ever you are in need, all I am able to give is yours. You have my email. May peace once again find you my friend, and all who come here.

Anonymous said...

A most unexpected source has blown my mind. Check out a video on google video called "Total Onslaught #211 The Secret Behind Secret Societies".

Anonymous said...

hey less .. astro Bob here
we are in an eclipse month and saturn and pluto are ramping up in a nasty square which hits your chart a bit and the exact spot that it is hotting is your overly empathic (should I say out of control at times empathic nature).. be cool it will pass.. You know how to get in touch if ya want any more details.

Anonymous said...

Les, this really does sound like some sort of attack. I'm glad Susanne is ok. And the dogs too. :)You will be ok as well. If you stopped blogging I would miss you terribly, but we all understand that nothing in this world is permanent. You, more than most, have to follow where Spirit leads. You're in my prayers.


Anonymous said...

Nina I think you are being too hard on the boy. I understand tough love but visible has been through things that would break an ordinary man many times already. I know you love him but I think everything hits him like a whip.

The cold merciless stars can be hard for one who seeks to shine among them. What would you do if someone wrote and told you the one you loved was dead and then you couldn't reach them? One thing I know about the man is that he's not a liar and he generally understates what he's going through.

I felt too much for too long and I wound up in recovery. It's twenty years now. He doesn't have that luxury. His focus is on everyone else and I don't think he can put it on himself anymore.

Think about what it's like to be an oracle and to get crushed every day. He was okay for a long time when he had his k but he doesn't have that anymore and that I have noticed. God took it away to make him stronger but he hasn't found that yet. He will. If anyone comes out of this on both feet it will be him.


Anonymous said...

I always start worrying when your posts are delayed. I try to be patient, knowing that other events just might be occuring in your life. But, just as you had the kidney stone attack, I begin to worry that some other part of your body may be failing. This is something which we all face at some point in our lives and it's actually easier to accept one's own mortality than to accept the loss of a loved one. I guess it all boils down to attachment/and or aversion and from there the pain begins. We, who are your audience, have to learn to let go if that is what you need to do, Les. Please, take care of yourself and your beloved Suzanne. We will always be dependent on you the longer you stay. We love you.

DodgyOne said...

The rabid demonoid dogs of destruction and death are at it again attacking only the weakest to steal their lands ->

The devils domain will be depleated of all but the zionutter demonoid drones, those creature that are a combined tinman, strawman and cowards that have no heart, brains or courage, there true melting will be so deserving as not a one has the compasion of a scorpion.

John said...

I didn't write this.

I am the final silence.
The last electrician alive.
And they called me 'The Sparkle'.
I was the best, I worked them all.

New ways, new ways.
I dream of wires.

We opened doors by thinking.
We went to sleep by dialing 'O'.
We drove to work by proxy.
I plugged my wife in, just for show.

New ways, new ways.
I dream of wires.

So I press 'C' for 'comfort'.
I dream of wires, the old days.

New ways, new ways.
I dream of wires.

I don't know what possessed me to submit this. Maybe a possession.

I have this on vinyl and haven't heard it since 1984. Something rang it up in me head for true. The second half of the song opens up and improves music ally too.

wv: calsa

Les, you are.

John said...

Ah I am so dense.

Here is to listen:

wv: rejud

nina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
the Grizz said...

New dog on campus here. Les, you have collected a great bunch of souls. There is strength in numbers (that's good, write that down). None of us can make it on our own (again). Your honesty not only gives strength to us, but reflects back to you amplified by the mirrors of your many receivers. You have got to be feeling that big-time. If you look behind you, the many footprints in the sand can carry you when you can't walk yourself.

Love and strength to all of you.

Oh, and Les, they're not going to get just a spanking. They are going to meet up with the sharp edge of the sword of justice. It will swing around and miss those that are standing strong and tall and have not bowed down to worship a treacherous mask.

Hang tough (just a figure of speech)

Waterlily2012 said...

Such a wonderfully heart-felt blog. I feel where you are coming from when you imply that this planet is sure getting old and sticking around on it feels too overwhelming sometimes. I find myself fantasizing about moving on over to the next dimension and dying. It sounds pretty good and I sit around thinking I'll be okay with it if a solar flare or a Planet X scenerio takes place and wipes us out. Then I look at my dogs and I don't want THEM to die, and if I die who would take care of them so I guess I'm stuck here and can't agree with Planet X or a flare wiping me out so that the dogs will be saved.

I'll join the ranks of the "batshit crazies" too. What can we expect when we have to walk around this place knowing what we know is going on? It drives us all batshit crazy at some point I imagine.

Hang in there, you are cared about very much even though it is through cyberspace.

sam said...

Everything's going to be all right, Les. Well.... maybe not, but you can't go there. Of course it helps the writing and all. If you want to take your mind off it for a minute or second, you can look at my Rott puppies at my website:
just scroll down to the bottom of the first page. I love your writing, man. It takes a while for me to get it, cause I'm not the sharpest tack in the drawer. But the world needs so much more of similar sentiment.

Publius said...

Horace is of course the poet. Goethe is this one:

‘Wer nie sein Brot’

Who has never eaten his bread with tears,

Who has never, through night’s sorrowful hours,

Sat on his bed and wept with fear,

He knows not you, you heavenly powers.

You lead us into life, and then

Your Will leads us on, into sin,

So you deliver us to pain:

On Earth all error’s paid again.

Anonymous said...

Your readers hear you loud and clear Les. I am very glad to hear that your love Susanne is OK. I can imagine that that kind of situation can be very tough. Ohh, I would be okay if you decided to stop blogging. It seems there is a season and place for everything. Maybe slow down your pace somewhat, take your time, and then do what feels right. If you decide to stop blogging in the near future I can already say that you have given me more spiritual faith than I had before I came here. I am a determined little bugger in that aspect in some ways but your words have helped a lot. This site has been the place I come to to learn. There's not much like that in the way of the truly spiritual path in my nearby physical surroundings here where I live in the U.S. If you do decide to continue blogging for a while longer rest assured I look forward to your further transmissions. I'm sending good thoughts and positive waves to you sir~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ your reader, bearwalk7

Visible said...

new Smoking Mirrors up-

Posting from the Bridge of the Starship.

Better Built Craftsman LLC said...

I'm glad your sweetheart is ok, you must have been terrified.

"I don’t like being alive. I often wish I was dead and I take no pleasure in just about anything. I like my succulents and I like the fauna that I wind up with somehow too but I don’t enjoy it here and so I am probably lying to you to a lot of the time. No… I really believe the things I tell you and they keep me going so… I’m probably not lying but I think I come off sounding stronger than I am."

Me too, honey. All my best.

Freddamedgjedda said...

I truly and deeply love you man. I know I love all that is conscious but my love for you feels stronger than most. You have been a beacon in my life for several years now, and your words have a tendency to find me exactly where I am at the moment and enlighten my possible paths. In other words, often what you write expand what I have been thinking. It feels like we are hooked up to the same "thougt-server", only you have fiber and I'm still on 56K. (and we are, and you have)

The time for change is accelerating, and the beloved Canine Lyricist will assume a role as a "spirit-guide" for most of this planets population. I have believed this for years and now the time seems near. And the signs are there.

Thank GOD(the sorce) your loved ones are healthy!!!

I have been addicted to several drugs in my life, legal and illegal. I have stopped doing all except pure weed and a Scandinavian type of chewing tobacco(Snus). Point is the worst thing I have ever quit is cigarettes. I woke up at night sweating like I had a fever for 3 weeks! Every fucking night!! So I assume this can influence both the physical and the mental, smoking tobacco is a severe drug!! After the three weeks I felt better than ever!
Then again some others I know quit smoking without any physical reaction...

I write it again: I LOVE YOU!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Dear Les and All,

These demons are fighting for space inside of your and the rest of our lives- remember what they are.

Demons are made from fear and working ONLY at putting out the LIGHT on this and many other planets.

The demons want to stop us gathering here and anywhere else we gather to share, comfort, regenerate and of course, confront each other.

My own experience with 'demons' has taught me that they will isolate, confuse and destroy all that is good inside of a person. Thus filling us up with and attracting to us the negative and fearful in the world.

From my own work with dreams- death is usually about great change, life altering to the point of a multi-dimensional shift. Distressing to dream about it, but remember- your body needs to get your attention, so it does this sometimes.

Since our invocations last week, I suspect we are all dealing with our demons.

Les, I think that you should take what has been offered by those who can offer it- perhaps this is part of the changes that are coming.

Energy can only work in this fashion- something is going out and something must come in to replace it.

For my part, I would like to offer you a session- your call. I am emailing you with some details.

What a great bunch of people here, I am honoured to share this space with such wonderful souls

Kindest Regards,


Anonymous said...

Hi Les,

You can print this or not; it is to you and Susanne primarily.

My thoughts and love to you and Susanne. I’ve quit smoking (several times...) and it’s so much more difficult than it appears; I send strength and love to Susanne to help her succeed and speed her healing. Weird dreams and spiteful behavior, I’ve been there and they aren’t something I’d wish on anybody.

I don’t know how it is with you and Susanne, but I know my children ground me. I have a bit of batshit crazy in my past, well more than a bit, and I try extremely hard not to go down that road. It always seems to cost me more than it was worth; karma teaches you the lessons you need, not the lessons you want. If my children weren’t around to ground me, I’d be in jail, in an asylum, dead, or on the road to one of those outcomes. They have made me whole and proven that no matter how vile the world I live in becomes, there is beauty and love near me.

As you are aware, I’ve had issues in the past with asking for help; in my head I should be able to cope with anything that gets thrown at me. But that isn’t always the case. You aren’t asking for help as such, but help is offered. Those of us that look forward to your words, that come to your blogs to see their thoughts written down, only wish that we could give you a tiny portion of the strength and hope that you’ve given us. I haven’t got much to give, but my prayers and love I send to you both. Go well where’er you go and know that the thoughts and prayers of many go with you.



Anonymous said...

Les, please don't quit. Take a break or like someone suggested let other's post blogs for awhile.

Someone is messing with you and they could mean business. Be extra careful and watch your dogs and tell Suzanne and her mom to be extra careful too. Maybe I'm paranoid but I'm going to say a prayer for strength and protection.

Out demons out.

Visible said...

My friend, it is already written. Whatever I do or don't do doesn't change the reality. All of us signed on for this some time ago. We have some wiggle room but not a whole lot. The good news is that we win and they lose, convincingly. Upon my soul you have my guarantee.

Caryl said...

Hang in there, Les. I enjoy your literate and honest posts and hope you can keep going. Good luck.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear that you are in trouble
I am in Italy too . Can I help you in some way ? We live in Trieste .I will email you .
Regards from Pietro

Visible said...

You are well north of me and I am fine. Thank you anyway. I am very fine at the moment. A friend down the road gave me 200 Euro and his banking route so I will have plenty dinero soon enough.

It's great that you care. I always manage somehow and right now all is well.

iconoclast said...

I'm glad to hear you and yours are okay and things have stabilized somewhat. I haven't posted often but always look forward to reading your excellent blogs.
Maybe if you set a date/time we could all meditate on whatever creature is causing the disturbance around your place; a show of force, so to speak.
If you supply details I'd be happy to send something via Western Union.

Visible said...

Ian, thank you but I'm okay. At no time is money anywhere near my primary interest and when I do find myself in the shit it works out somehow. This didn't just happen to me... I mean, the personal; threats did but the money thing was and is widespread.

If anything I am sorry that i am drinking and don't have any good drugs so- as honest and revealing as that may be, I probably need to be locked up more than humored... just kidding but that's how it is.

Anonymous said...

Les I agree with the recent commentator who suggested it may have been an attack. Some of the alphabet agencies have psychics working for them whose job is to formulate magik on those they consider a threat.

One can protect themselves and their loved ones with the application of orgone generators on and about their person and in their environment.

Most negative beings, mainly Reptilian types, that normaly operate on planes other that ours are not able to function well in the presence of orgonite, or the pure orgone environment that it creates.

It may benefit you to secure some. Orgonite is easily made by anyone that can read and follow directions. The raw ingredients are metal lathe turnings, polyetheline resin (fiberglass resin), and quartz crystal.

If you have never encountered the benifits of orgonite, for a better background go to any of the orgone sites. I prefer Don Croft's .

Orgone helps keep the dark ones in their place, human or otherwise.

Les please don't ever stop doing what you do so well.

Keeping us informed is a part of your karma.

Namaste Les...Oliver in GA.

Anonymous said...

I can't tell if my comment got through, since something odd happened.
I'm glad you are both all right now.

You are a blessing to many.
May you always be blessed and protected.

My very best wishes to you and Suzanne.

DNA002 said...

Praying for you dear Les, and Suzanne too. Thank you for your blogs - I keep coming back for a breath of sanity! Thank you for being so open. It's tough being a mystic, no doubt about that - hope you can feel us all sending you our love.

gurnygob said...

Les You need some cheering-up so I’m singing this wee song for you

Always look on the bright side of life, de-do, de-do, de-do, de-do, always look on the bright side of life.
Ps, glad to hear you’re sweetie is okay.

Anonymous said...

The Parable of the Weeds
24 Jesus told them another parable: "The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field. 25 But while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat, and went away. 26 When the wheat sprouted and formed heads, then the weeds also appeared. 27 "The owner's servants came to him and said, 'Sir, didn't you sow good seed in your field? Where then did the weeds come from?' 28 " 'An enemy did this,' he replied. "The servants asked him, 'Do you want us to go and pull them up?' 29 " 'No,' he answered, 'because while you are pulling the weeds, you may root up the wheat with them. 30 Let both grow together until the harvest. At that time I will tell the harvesters: First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat and bring it into my barn.' "

· Luke 3:17 NIV
His winnowing fork is in his hand to clear his threshing floor and to gather the wheat into his barn, but he will burn up the chaff with unquenchable fire."
The weeds are becoming increasingly more apparent as the crops mature. The time of the harvest draws near. First the weeds will be destroyed, then the chaff. We may see ourselves as separate from the weeds, but we are not yet perfect. Some time on the threshing floor is required.

gurnygob said...

Anonymous said...6:36 PM
I can't tell if my comment got through, since something odd happened.

Me as well. after writing my little bit, it just blinked out off the comments page just as i was about to fill in the word Verification.

anyway Les, glad to here you are feeling better.

Anonymous said...

You touch me very deeply Les, as others do here

Visible said...

You touch me too Mick. Every time I see your name it brings a smile to my face.

It's rough and I'm a mess but don't count me out. Thank you one and all and please stop sending me money. You probably need it more than I do. I'm just going to send it back and stick you with the fee (grin)

Hey, none of you could love me any more than I do you. You've lit up my life like no words can ever express. they are going down and we are going up; nothing more to it than that.

Visible said...

I'm not better gurnygob, I'm just faking it with more precision. Nothing has changed. At the same time it hasn't gotten worse so I guess that's a good thing

Visible said...

I walked across the field to see Black this afternoon with some hamburger and he was gone. His master was taking him in for treatment and there was no question of how much she loved him when we talked. I feel like a real shit for doubting here but it didn't look good on the surface. So maybe she passed him on at the vets advice or the treatment is going on at this moment.

I'm thinking there's no finer gift than to leave this place but you can't go wishing for things that compromise your life's work. It was so hard for me all of my life and only in the last ten years have I had any smooth water. when it comes back on you it's a bitch. I'm not complaining. I'm warm and I'm inside that's more than a lot of people have and I have you too and that is a great deal more than most people have.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Again Les,
You set a great example. If you can't keep on keep'en on then you can't really expect anyone else too either. Watch for the negative re-enforcing cycles. (I'm always caught in a couple) Take a break and a beggers cup and go do your music on a corner; with potential. God Bless your efforts of expression & illumination.
PEACE BE WITH YOU. Bob in Burlington.....Maine

mike turner said...

I am a pacifist by inclination but maybe that is down to indoctrination but the more I read the more my piss boils and makes me think that Che beat the path which we should tread.

Visible said...

Che was indeed a remarkable hero you should see Sonnenberg's treatment of him, in two parts.

Steven is pretty fucking remarkable and that is why I love and hate the Jews equally. they are the best and the worst of us. But it takes a gentile to finally nail the truth to the barn door. I did it four hundred years ago and I am doing it now.

a GrebBear said...

Vis, We (I) love your work !
... this article though ???
Sure you're human (maybe))) and some room for 'fear', is necessary ... but today, you're sounding allot like someone 'pretending' to be you !!?? Fear this, and scary bullshit that ?? ... humanity is a mess, but YOU ??
... what have you done with VIS ??
That pedestal of knowledge (our collective past) that we stand upon, can offer a terrific view, but when we let our past, live in the now; we can see nothing from our pedestals, but for, the ground between our feet.
If, its really you ... I'm surprised at how much 'want' is in your language, apposed to 'accepting what is' ... and Yes, shit will//needs to hit the fan on a global scale; because, for instance, the number of people whom still believe, the MsM official 9/11 story ???
... what will it take to 'move' these people forward ??


... and then they will likely 'opt-out' via programed response(s) to calamities XY & Z; as in "the Happening", all "Zombie" movies, etc. (countless propaganda programing fits here)
Do what you Love, what excites you ... and quit your sniffling )!! Yes, you say what you like, its 'your' audience ... even when your emotions are pin balling in and out of both ditches.
We are all here and "here", by choice ... there was no guarantee and admission, was free (I believe??), although, we all owe a great deal of gratitude, for you, being you, Merci ) ... and of course, life being Life ))
Now, back to clarity from your perspective. Remember, You are me and I am you ... the audience has grown on its own accord ... PROOF that awareness is growing ... stay the course (your course) if you feel it; if not ... we'll miss you and in that, we'll (I will) continue towards the light with the knowledge you've helped bestow upon us.

Merci Brother ))


Peace Love Light Truth
(- ;
; -)

Anonymous said...

Kheireddine,you are the real whiner,your real name is probably Todd or David,and you are giving a bad name to moslems.Keep manners with people of goodness.

Anonymous said...

LV wrote
"I’m not sure that I am doing you or myself much good with these blogs."

Les, you are my light house in the storm. I know that sounds a bit cliche, but I assure you it is most heartfelt. The metaphor is accurate.

You are so appreciated. I hope You feel this.

Life on this Earth is very difficult - the more sensitive and empathic you are, the harder it is. The older I get, the more my empathic abilities increase.

I have yet to learn how to shield myself from incoming blasts. Meditation helps. Isolation helps. But nothing alleviates the pain of this absurd planet.

I often think I was dropped here by an alien ship. Sometimes I look up at the sky like a small child and wonder if they're coming back for me.

They never do. No one's coming for me. At least not now.

Thanks Les, for sharing so much of yourself - and for providing a space for us to share.

I love you.

Visible said...

Thank you Liz because it is killing me right now. I am huddled with my doggies who are responding more than at any time I have known them. The pressure is crushing me but I will survive this bullshit. I will wake up stronger tomorrow than I have ever been in my life. I had to cancel my radio show tonight; technical problems but I couldn't have done it in any way, so I guess that was good luck.

Hang tight everyone, help is on the way.

Anonymous said...

sending massive love your way


Anonymous said...

Les, I've come to seek your newest posts with enthusiasm for a yeat plus, and never written. But, man, you touch me and I like the bent of your subject matter. You, brother, are chicken soup for my soul. I get so much to chew on and see where it fits in my life, I don't want you to quit. I just want you to take care of les.I'd not forget you, my friend.

Anonymous said...


You have been in my thoughts this past week - I sensed something, but didn't trust my instinct and as such didn't send you a message.

I deeply regret that now that I see you have indeed experienced some torment and I am sending you all my positive thoughts and energy. I appreciate that you could at times become overwhelmed with a sense of responsibility given the community you have created through your written and spoken word but in doing that you have also created an extended support network to feed your intellectual and spiritual fervour.

Please be kind to yourself. Sometimes you just need to slow down, take stock and re-charge. Often this helps you to come back doubly focused. Keep going Les - I think we all need each other.

Big hug

Anonymous said...

You can stay in my house Visible any time. You have made me what I am. I owe you big time.


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

You have changed my life and that is all I can say.

Anonymous said...

You are Les Visible, and you bloody well rock my sorry world. All I've got is love and best wishes, and I'm sending you the lot.

There... they're sent.

Mark, Worcestershire, England.

Ben There said...


You are in my thoughts and prayers. Not to sound like a broken record but please once again know that your words, insight, and love have been a powerful force in my own life; probably more powerful than I even realize at this moment. I can still remember the first essay and the way it lit me up inside...maybe you should find it and re-read your own amazing words from that old piece ("Losing Beautifully And Winning It All"). That and others like it have been moving me forward ever since.

I won't even pretent to understand the nature of your problems at the moment, but if there is anything I can do to help...a phone call,anything, let me know.

I heard something simple and beautiful once, about our purpose in life being to help eachother get through 'this', whatever 'this' is. I've found that even in the best of times life is a heavy burden to bear...and yet, and yet...remarkable wonderful in certain moments also. It's all here for us, heaven and hell. I'm not sure where that leaves us but just getting through it is no easy task.

Anyway man...In whatever way I can be, I"m here for you. As you once said to me in one of my dark moments, I'm going to imagine and envision you with all of the resources and strength necessary to get through this ordeal (because I KNOW it to be true).



Eight Hands for Kali said...

Take a break if needed L.V. We'll keep soldiering on. I often think about things on the radio show and on the blog. Anything that makes you think is good. Don't burn yourself out with too much on the plate. Your psychic antennae are probably bristling with all the shit going in the world. It is like you said in a post the other day tell those you love that you love em one day you won't have that option. I have a beanbag chair in the closet and an extra long headphones chord to the hi-fi it is where I go to escape. The outside world could go away when I'm jamming some old Rush, or Pink Floyd in the chamber of solitude otherwise known as a closet. Have a better one.

Anonymous said...

Glad your girl is fine, Les.

You're in Italy? Have been for 4 years?

Can you tell me what part?

That's my native land!

Lucky you, not here on this miserable North American continent.

I envy you so. I haven't been back home in 3 years.

And now, with the scanners and fondlings at airports, looks like I won't get back for many more.

You have dogs? What breed?

I have a Schnauzer answers to the name of Schultzie.

As for your feeling responsible to your readers, listen, you give and gave more than most.

I'll miss your exquisite writings very much, but see to yourself first.

We'll be here when you return.

Cheer up, man, you're in Italy!

God Bless,

Hank said...

Totally off topic, but I went to see Avatar and it was the most amazing shit I have ever seen. The story line is not new, but the presentation was nothing short of amazing. For any and all who love films, this is a must see. I never wanted it to end. Peace

Visible said...


Avatar affected me so much that I dreamed about it for several nights after. I was sent the screener. I get most films that way. The video stores have nothing around here; if they exist at all and there are no theaters. I was supposed to be an actor I guess but I didn't like the company. Music and writing were fall back positions. I suppose I am better off but I did make some good friends who still think about me now and then and send me the latest stuff.

Avatar was very well done. I don't care what anyone says. It was well done; for a movie I mean.

Visible said...


I live in the far south. My dogs are mutts. Poncho is some kind of bull terrier and The Little Guy who is now about 3 and a half months old and getting to be not such a little guys is- from what I can tell- half Sheltie and half German Shepard. I would say Collie but there are none that I have seen here. I have seen a Sheltie or two because people have goats and sheep here

Visible said...

A new Petri Dish-

Posting from the Bridge Again.

Anonymous said...


Oooops Im sorry I should have read this before hand. If anyone has helped me understand how the deal with hard times, its you. I know you have the gifts and love to contunie even if you dont right now.
Im worried that you will fall back into a pattern you dont need anymore? What do I know?
Ive said before, add to all things and dont take away. Please dont hide your heart behide your fists and loss.
Sometimes we just need to take it all apart, and sometimes it happens for us? Ask why and live with small answers.
It seems we are coming to a point in time where the test of faith is super big. Have faith you can start over. The only way to test ones life is to take it way and see whats left?
Youre still here man?
The Fool

Visible said...

anonymous insults aren't allowed. Did you happen to notice what a small minority you are in?

Enough said.



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